Chris Essay 21

4/29/10

Mr. Salsich

English

Multi Genre Essay:

Friendship

Dear reader,

            If you are accustomed to the normal, formal essay, this may be a little confusing to you. This is a multi-genre essay including a standard poem, a haiku, a recipe, and an expository paragraph. My expository paragraph talks about examples in the famous play, Romeo and Juliet, by William Shakespeare. The entire essay is about the theme of friendship.

Sincerely,

Chris

Poem: A True Friend

Always kind,

Always caring,

Always there,

Always trustworthy,

Always strong,

Always helpful,

Always generous,

Always special,

Always a true friend.

In everyone’s lives there is a true friend;

Someone who changes your life by simply being there;

Someone who makes you laugh endlessly; 

Someone who makes everyday a good day;

Someone who you love.

When you're down, 

And the world seems dark and empty, 

Your true friends lifts you up,

And makes that dark and empty world

Suddenly seem bright and full.

Your true friend is like the sun,

Rising above the black night,

Creating the bright, beautiful day.

Your true friends get you through the hard times,

The sad times, and the confusing times;

Your true friend is there to guide you,

They are there to tell you,

“Everything is going to be okay.”

Your true friends are the epitome of happiness,

They complete your life.

These friends are part of you,

Without them, you are nothing. 

Your true friends are your friends forever,

And lucky for you,

Forever has no end.

Recipe for Friendship

1. Always be kind.

            --Kindness is one of the keys to a good friendship. If you are mean to someone, why would they want to be your friend?

2. Always be honest.

            --Even if you make a mistake, it is good to be honest with your friend. It is easier for them to forgive someone they trust.

3. Always Communicate.

            --If you do not communicate with your friend regularly either through seeing them in person or communicating another way, they might feel left out and un-loved.

4. Always be helpful.

            --You must always be there for your friend. Even if you do not help them in a       major way, just saying little things to them will make them feel better.

If you follow these steps you will be a truly great friend.

Expository Paragraph

(TS) In Romeo and Juliet, there are many examples of friendship. (SD) The first example is when his friends get him to go to the party. (CM) His friends like him and want to have a good time, so they bring him to the party. (CM) Also, if they hadn’t been good friends and brought him to the party, he would not have met Juliet. (SD) Another friend he has in the story is a beautiful, charming, and kind girl named Juliet.  (CM) Juliet immediately charms him with her beauty, but he realizes she’s more than that; he realizes she’s a good person, and a good friend. (CM) One reason she is a good friend is that she is sensible with her decisions. For example starting on line 124 she says, “I have no joy in this contact tonight. It is too rash, too unadvised, too sudden, too like the lightening, which doth cease to be.” She does not want to be too fast with their relationship; a beautiful flower can only come from a bud that has slowly ripened. Beautiful flowers do not magically appear on their’ own. (CS) Friendship can progress into a relationship, but if it moves too suddenly, it causes conflict.

Haiku

My friends are awesome,

They really care about me,

My friends define ME.

Self Assessment

One difficulty I faced in this essay was using correctness. In a normal essay it is easy to spot punctuation mistakes, but when I write poems, I tend to not use proper punctuation. One way that I tried to help myself with this is that I first wrote my poem out as a paragraph and then split it into different lines after I had checked for punctuation. I believe a strong point in this essay is my poem. I really like how my poem is written. It flows very well and gives a good message. In future multi-genre essays I would still like to focus on correct punctuation. If I had to give myself a grade I would myself an A-.

Chris Essay 20

April 20, 2010

Mr. Salsich

English

FINAL DRAFT

Family Matters:

An Essay on the Role Models in To Kill a Mockingbird and My Life

(TS) Family members are there your whole lives, so they must be altruistic role models for you. (CM) Over the years, I have learned many things from the role models in my life, and fortunately, they have all been good. (CM) Everyone has family members in their lives, including the characters in To Kill a Mockingbird. (CS) I can find many relations between these characters and my real life role models. One relation is that some of the characters and my family members both posses kind, caring and unselfish hearts.

(TS) I truly admire the many great members of my family. (SD) Firstly, I truly admire my astounding mother because she has an amazing job. (CM)  Amazingly, she has the tough, the strenuous and the arduous job of being a scientist for 25 years, as well as raising a child. (Parallelism)  (CM) She has maintained this job, but also has cooked family dinner's and helped me in my studies, as well as other tasks. (SD) Another character in my family that I admire is my marvelous father. (CM) My father has worked hard as an engineer, but has also somehow managed to be a normal father to me. (CM) Also, as an engineer for the navy, he has gone on numerous submarine voyages beneath the ocean’s surface. I admire this very much, as I know I would never be brave enough to do this. (SD) The final, and possibly most admirable person in my family, is my charismatic, clever and cool (Alliteration, thesaurus word and repetition) babci(grandmother). (CM) She has not only raised my mother, but she has also been a major part in raising me. (CM) Ever since I was little she has gone out of her way to support me. She would make the hour’s drive at a moment’s notice to come and see me or take care of me. (CS) These admirable people in my life are amazing, and I hope that one day, I can be as astounding as them.

(TS) I have found a few ways that my admirable babci (grandmother) can be related to To Kill a Mockingbird. (SD) Just like Atticus Finch, my babci is a great person; she is caring, thoughtful, pleasant, kind, willing and patient. (Loose sentence) (CM) Atticus is always patient with his children, and cared for them very much; my prodigious (thesaurus word) babci was the same way while helping to raise me. (CM) She would always care for me whole-heartedly, and was always patient with my childhood behaviors. (SD) Another character I can relate my astonishing babci to in To Kill a Mockingbird is Aunt Alexandria. (CM) Aunt Alexandria tried to bestow her ladylike ways upon Scout, and my babci did a similar thing to me. (CM) Throughout my childhood she taught me manners, as well as the values of dignity, respect, integrity. She taught me how to be a good person. (CS) The marvelous family values that my babci possesses can be related to the values of characters in To Kill a Mockingbird.

(TS) As role models, family members reflect their actions upon others. (CM) In fact, if you observe a family, a child will usually act a lot like their parent or other family member because that is who they emulate. (CM) An example of this in To Kill a Mockingbird is that by the end of the book, Scout notices that Jem is becoming wise and able to answer questions, just like his father. (CS) I hope to continue to learn from my family members, the role models in my life because one day, I will be a role model to the next generation.



Self Assessment:


The most difficult part of this essay for me was deciding what family members to use. This is not because I thought none were admirable, rather so many are admirable, that I had to decide three. The biggest difference between my first and final drafts is that I worked on polishing up the essay to make sure it had good style. Although I feel i made good points in my first draft, some of them were not as clearly written as I would like, so I tried to focus on editing this. The best part of my essay was probably the topics. I feel that I chose great examples of admirable family members and made good points about them. I feel that I could have looked it over more carefully to make it flow better, and also I believe I could have added more information to the essay to support my thoughts better. Overall, I believe I deserve a B.

Poem

Sadness

By Chris Collins

Everyone goes through tough times;

It’s part of life.

But the only way sadness can last forever,

Is if you let it.

Fight it,

Push it away,

And never let it win.

It can take over your life;

Controlling you,

Like a puppeteer manipulates his puppet.

Don’t ever let this happen.

Cut these restraints that bind you.

Be free;

Free from heartache’s evil ways.

You must remember this:

Everyone faces difficulties in their lives,

And sadness will overtake you,

Like a hurricane;  

Like the blackened veil of night.

But remember, no matter what,

The storm will always pass and

Dawn will always come.

Chris Essay 19

April 8, 2010

Mr. Salsich

English

Songs

An Essay on Songs Related to Romeo and Juliet, and My Life

(TS) Songs are some of the most powerful forms of poetry. (CM) A song can speak right to your heart, and to me it is more powerful than a poem. (CM) One of the reasons it is more powerful is because it is accompanied by music. This music sets the mood of the song, making it more dramatic than plain, spoken poetry. (CS) Songs are very important to me as they can be related to many things like Romeo and Juliet, as well as my own life.

(TS) I had to think extensively (thesaurus) about what to use as my song, but I finally came to the conclusion to use, “Seize the Day,” by Avenged Sevenfold. (SD) In the song, they say, “Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost.” Our time here on earth is short, so it is necessary for us live life to its fullest. (CM) During the rather insignificant (thesaurus) amount of time we have on this earth, we must seize the day and live life the way we want to. (CM) We must not dwell on our past mistakes; we must keep looking toward the future and seize the day. If we don’t control our lives, at the end we will regret that we wasted our life over a simple mistake. (SD) This song --filled with solemn melodies, poetic lyrics, and a sincere message-- really touches my heart. (appositive) (CM) This is not only a well sung song; it has very powerful lyrics that really make you think about the way your living life. (CM) The music video is extremely heartbreaking, and makes me realize that I must think carefully about the decisions I make. These decisions can change my entire life, for better, or for worse. (CS) Whenever I find myself doing nothing, I remember this song and I go and do something because every moment in our lives is precious. I must seize the day and live my life before I have no life left to live. If you were to die tomorrow, would you be satisfied with the way you lived life?

(TS) “Break," by Three Days Grace --a stupendous (thesaurus), powerful song-- can be related to Romeo and Juliet in many ways. (appositive) (SD) The song says, "Break away from everybody, break away from everything," and this is exactly what Romeo did. (CM) Romeo broke away from his family’s traditions and sought out love with someone from the "opposing" family. (CM) He also, “broke away,” from everybody by ignoring them to be with his star-crossed lover. (SD) The song also says, "If you can't stand the way this place is, take yourself to higher places;" just like Romeo did. (CM) Romeo escaped from the world and, "took himself to higher places," by confining himself in his room, concerning his family. (CM) Romeo also, "couldn't stand," the quarreling (thesaurus) between his family and his star crossed lover’s family, so he took himself to higher places by killing himself. (CS) If you were in Romeo’s position, would you listen to the song and, “break away,” and fall in love with Juliet?

(TS) Songs are very important as they can be related to many things, as well as everyone’s lives in some way. (CM) In my opinion, it is impossible to not be able to find a song that somehow fits your life. (CM) I have found many songs that relate to my life, as well as to many other things I have come across. (CS) If you had to pick one song that summed up your entire life the best, what song would you pick?

Self Assessment:

For me, the hardest thing about this essay was thinking of songs to use. I know many good songs, and many of them could somehow be related to Romeo and Juliet. Also, of the tons of songs I like, many are important in my life. This is why it was very difficult to narrow it down to two songs that I thought worked the best. I am happy with the songs I chose. I believe I improve on my past essays by writing a more clear and thoughtful essay, with very straightforward opinions. In my next essay I would like to add even more thesaurus words, and make my writing more “fluid”. Overall, I would give myself a B on this essay.

Chris Essay 18

March 10, 2010

Mr. Salsich

English

FINAL DRAFT FOR GRADING

Forgiveness:

An Essay on To Kill a Mockingbird and My Life

(TS) Bryant H. McGill once said, “There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” (CM) You must forgive someone to truly love them, but if you do not love them at all in the first place, then why would you want to forgive them? (CM) If everyone in this world judged people by their mistakes, almost everyone would be enemies. (CM) Everyone makes mistakes, and true love is shown by the ability to forgive people of. (CS) Forgiveness is used every day, as evident in To Kill a Mockingbird, and my own life.

(TS) Forgiveness is hard to come by, and Mayella Ewell deserves it, but Mr. Ewell does not. (SD) To me, forgiveness means putting yourself in someone’s place to understand why they did something, and this is what the people of Maycomb had to do for Mayella and Bob Ewell. (CM) If you put yourself in Mayells’s place you see that she lied to the courtroom for the fear of being beaten by her father. (CM) On the other hand, if you put yourself in Mr. Ewell’s place you see that what he did was unjustified. He beat her for no reason, and forced her to lie to the court. These actions are appalling and unforgivable. (SD) Although Mayella Ewell lied to a courtroom, if she did not her father most likely would have beaten her. (CM) Her father proved that he would in fact beat her, and this image of terror was instilled in her mind throughout the trial. (CM) If I was in the same position I would have probably told the truth, but Mayella was under immense pressure to lie. You could tell she was being forced to lie by her displays of emotion. (SD) Mr. Ewell can never be forgiven for his actions. (CM) What he did was cruel, what he did was unjustified, what he did can never be forgiven. (tricolon) (CM) Mr. Ewell harmed the person he gave life, and to me, this is one of the worst crimes. (CS) You need to understand someone to forgive them, but if you cannot understand why someone did something, than there might not be a reason to forgive them.

(TS) It is a fact that everybody makes mistakes, but not everyone can be forgiven for these mistakes. (SD) If you make a simple mistake like receiving a bad grade, you should be forgiven. (CM) Being forgiven can actually help you improve. (CM) If you are forgiven for your mistake, you have a fresh start rather than having the bad grade “hanging” above your head. (SD) If you make a “medium” level mistake such as harming someone slightly (recoverable injuries), you can be forgiven. (CM) This forgiveness may take longer and would require harder work. (CM) If you help them heal, and sufficiently apologize, you may be forgiven. (SD) However, if you hurt someone in a way in which you cause death or leave permanent emotional or physical scarring, you should not be forgiven. (CM) This action is not something you can simply “make better;” this action is not something you can fix; this action is not forgivable. (tricolon) (CM) Although you cannot be forgiven for your actions, I also believe you should not be punished. (CS) Forgiveness is not something you simply receive; it is something you earn.

(TS) Forgiveness is hard to achieve, but once you are forgiven, you know you are truly loved. (CM) Mayella knew that the people of Maycomb loved her. (CM) They forgave her for lying to the court because they knew she was forced to do it. (CM) If I make a mistake, but am forgiven, I know that the person who forgave me loves me, even if they are still mad. (CS) When someone does something wrong, it creates so much emotion, that sometimes, forgiveness is easier said than done.

Self-Assessment:

This essay was very difficult for me to write about because I have different opinions about forgiveness. For instance, in my first body paragraph’s CS I said that if you cannot understand why someone did something you cannot forgive them. As I look back at this I realize that just because you don’t understand why someone did something, doesn’t necessarily mean what they did was wrong an unforgivable. Everyone looks at things differently, and I now realize this is a mistake I made in my essay. I believe that I improved immensely from my first to second draft. I overlooked many mistakes in my first draft that I fixed for my second draft. With these errors fixed, my paragraph flows a lot better. I still feel I could have added a few more thesaurus words to make my paragraph better. Overall, I believe this was a fairly good essay and I would give myself a B+.